Grief can be one of the most painful experiences we move through. When someone we love dies, particularly when the loss is sudden or unexpected, it can leave us shocked, disorientated and unsure of how to make sense of life without them.
But grief isn’t only about losing someone we love. We can grieve the loss of a pet, our health, our abilities, a relationship, a part of our identity, or a future we had imagined for ourselves. Sometimes we are grieving something that other people may not even recognise as a loss.
I believe there is no single way to grieve and no timetable for when grief should be finished. Healing may involve making space for the sadness, allowing emotions to be felt, and gradually discovering how to live alongside what has changed.
In my work with grief and loss, I offer a compassionate space where you don’t have to make your feelings fit a particular idea of what grief should look like. We can make room for whatever is present, including sadness, anger, relief, love, uncertainty or even moments of peace.
Understanding Grief and Loss
Grief is a deeply individual experience. Sometimes it arrives as an overwhelming wave of sadness. At other times it may feel like numbness, anger, disbelief, loneliness or a sense that the world has somehow changed around you.
After a death, there can be many different layers to what we are grieving. We may miss the person themselves, while also grieving the life we expected to share with them. There can be difficult or complicated feelings within this too. Relief can exist alongside sadness, particularly when someone has been very unwell or suffering for a long time. Feeling relief does not mean that you loved them any less.
Loss can also take less visible forms. You might be grieving a change in your body following illness or surgery, a loss of independence, a relationship that has ended, a hoped-for family, a career, or an idea of who you thought you would become.
Sometimes the hardest part is that other people don’t recognise the loss in the same way you do. Therapy can offer a place to acknowledge what has happened, honour the significance of your loss, and make sense of your experience without needing to minimise it or move on before you're ready.
How Therapy for Grief and Loss May Help
Grief isn’t something that needs to be fixed or hurried away. Therapy can offer a place to slow down and feel what is there, particularly when emotions have become difficult to carry alone.
Together, we can gently explore the sadness, anger, guilt, relief, longing, or other emotions that may arise. Sometimes grief needs words; at other times it simply needs to be witnessed. There may also be unfinished conversations, changes in identity, or questions about how life can look now.
Over time, the work may become less about surviving the loss and more about discovering how the relationship, love, or meaning connected to what has been lost can continue to have a place in your life.
Grief can change with time. The pain may become less immediate while the significance of what was lost remains. The relationship, experience or part of yourself that mattered can continue to have a place in your life, while you slowly find your own way forward.
How I Work with Grief and Loss
My approach to grief is compassionate, relational and grounded in the understanding that everyone experiences loss differently.
Through psychotherapy and somatic psychotherapy, we can explore both the emotional experience of grief and how it is held within your body. Sometimes grief can feel like heaviness, tightness, exhaustion or a sense of being unable to move forward. Paying attention to these experiences can gently support the natural process of grief, helping emotions that may have felt overwhelming, distant or difficult to express become easier to acknowledge and carry.
My work is also informed by Gestalt and Transactional Analysis, offering different ways of understanding your experience, your relationships, and how you are making sense of what has happened.
I have a particular interest in supporting people through grief associated with serious illness and death. I have worked alongside people and families experiencing cancer and have also spent time in hospice settings supporting people and their families through the end-of-life process.
Grief doesn't follow a timetable, and I don't believe it should be rushed toward an outcome. Our work allows your experience to unfold naturally, while we stay alongside whatever feels most important for you.
Is therapy for grief and loss right for me?
You may be considering therapy because your grief feels overwhelming, has become difficult to carry, or is affecting your ability to connect with everyday life. Perhaps someone close to you has died, or your loss is connected to illness, disability, a relationship, a pet, a change in your identity, or a future that didn’t unfold as you’d hoped.
You don’t have to be certain that what you’re experiencing is grief before reaching out. Sometimes simply knowing that something has been lost and that you’re struggling to find your way through it is enough. There is no requirement to be ready to move on. Therapy can be a place to honour what mattered, make room for the emotions that come with loss, and gradually discover how life can continue while carrying what has changed.
Is what I’m feeling normal?
Grief doesn’t follow one particular pattern, and there is no single right way to grieve. You might feel sadness, anger, guilt, relief, numbness, confusion, or even moments when you feel much like yourself again. These feelings can come and go, sometimes when you least expect them.
You may also find that your grief changes over time or feels different from what you imagined it would be. Therapy can provide a space to talk openly about what you’re experiencing, without needing to compare your grief with anyone else’s or judge yourself for how you are responding.
Why do I feel things I didn’t expect after a loss?
Grief can bring emotions that surprise you. You might feel anger, guilt, relief, numbness, longing, or even moments of happiness alongside deep sadness. These feelings can sometimes seem confusing or make you question whether you are grieving “properly.”
There is no single way grief should feel. Different emotions can come and go, sometimes changing from one moment to the next. Having a feeling does not mean you wanted the loss, caused it, or cared any less about what you have lost.
Therapy can provide a place to make sense of these experiences without judgement, so you don’t have to carry the added pressure of wondering whether your grief is “normal.”
Does grief ever get easier?
Grief may not disappear, but it can change. In the beginning, the loss can feel all-consuming, with emotions arriving in waves and making ordinary life difficult to manage. Over time, the intensity may soften, even though there can still be moments when the loss feels very close.
For many people, moving forward isn’t about leaving the person, relationship, or part of life that was lost behind. It can be about finding a way for what mattered to continue to have a place in your life while gradually making room for what comes next.
There is no particular point at which you should be “over” your grief. Therapy can support you in finding your own way of living alongside the loss, at a pace that feels right for you.
What if my loss happened a long time ago?
You can seek support for grief at any point. Sometimes a loss is something you have carried for many years, or feelings may return later in life when something brings the loss back into focus.
There is no particular timeframe in which grief has to be finished. Therapy can give you space to explore what the loss means to you now, how it has shaped your life, and what you may need as you continue forward. You don’t have to leave the past behind in order to find a way of living with what has changed.
What if I don’t know what to say in therapy?
You don’t need to arrive knowing exactly what you want to talk about. Grief can be difficult to put into words, particularly when the loss is recent or the feelings are complicated.
We can start with whatever feels easiest to talk about, or simply begin with what has been happening for you lately. You don’t have to tell your whole story at once, and you can choose what you feel ready to explore.
Sometimes talking is helpful, and sometimes grief needs to be felt, witnessed, or approached in a different way. We can find a way of working that feels manageable for you.